


the return

by spaceeggscreams



Category: Blaseball (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hall of Flame (Blaseball), M/M, Panic Attacks, Tillman Henderson Has Feelings, declan and mike are just mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-15
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-24 06:07:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30067824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spaceeggscreams/pseuds/spaceeggscreams
Summary: It wasn't any easier the second time.Tillman returns to the Hall of Flame. It's not a fun time.
Relationships: Tillman Henderson/Declan Suzanne, Tillman Henderson/Declan Suzanne/Mike Townsend, Tillman Henderson/Mike Townsend
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	the return

**Author's Note:**

> CW for swearing, anxiety/panic attacks

It wasn’t any easier the second time. 

It had all happened so quickly. Tillman had been half-listening to the results being announced, choosing instead to bury his face in the ever interesting drink in front of his face. He had been just about to raise the glass to his lips when he heard his name, freezing in place like ice had suddenly filled his veins. He was both starkly present, hearing the words, but feeling like he had left his body. Countless faces in the bar turned towards him as the voice finished its announcement. He blinked and the faces were gone, replaced with the cold, foreboding emptiness of the Hall.

He stood, head swimming as he frantically tried to process what had just happened. He didn’t think anything could be worse than when he had been incinerated. Nothing could compare to the way the fire had ripped through his entire body, burning each and every part of him until there was nothing left. The pain had remained until he opened his eyes again, to see the Hall for the first time. Somehow, despite the lack of pain, this was worse. To one moment be surrounded by people, by life, and the next to be in a place that reeked of death. 

At least last time he’d seen it coming. 

At least last time he hadn’t bothered to get close to anyone.

“ _Fuck,_ ” he swore softly as traitorous tears sprung to his eyes, “Declan is going to kill me.” He paused, processing the words before tacking on an even softer, “ _Again._ ” It was after the words came out of his mouth that the tears finally started to fall, tracing down his face in silent betrayal to his desperate need to be okay. 

At least fate had the dignity to return him to his sort of home, the one he’d made in the Hall. It was a single room, in a back corner away from the main hub. There was little in the room, given that furniture and decorations were hard to come by here, but he had managed to scrounge up a small bed and desk, as well as an old, tattered poster from his first season with the Crabs. None of these things mattered in that moment, as Tillman collapsed gently to the floor, hugging his knees to his chest as the tears grew and sobs started to wrack his body. 

He knew that he wasn’t the best player in the league, not by a long shot, and he knew that there was always a chance of returning here, but something in him, some small part deep within his soul had hoped that he would never have to. A hope that, maybe, this time he would be good enough to stay. That hope fizzled out as he broke down on the cold floor of his room. Thoughts raced around his head, too quick to fully process each one, but the general theme stayed the same.

_No one will want you back now._

The thought shook him to his core, one that he’d had before, of course, but never quite this loud. It echoed around his brain, getting louder and louder until it was the only thing he could think while he sobbed into his knees. There was no way the Thieves would want him back, he had always been a shitty pitcher. And the Crabs? Well, that ship had sailed long ago. And Mike and Declan? He swallowed deeply, pushing away the thought that your boyfriend dying is a good way to finally get out of a relationship you didn’t want to be in.

He stayed in that position for what felt like hours, until all that was left of him was heavy breathing and tear stained jeans. Tillman turned his head, resting his cheek on his knees as his breakdown left, leaving him exhausted and even colder than before. He sighed deeply, staring at the grooves of the concrete floor, tracing the shapes with his eyes. 

He was startled out of his pattern from a buzzing in his pocket. His phone. Last time, it hadn’t worked here, displaying only a constant loading circle, but when he managed to unfold himself and pull his phone from his pocket, he saw that there was a single message waiting. It had been sent before he was pulled into this plane of existence, probably in the few moments between his name being said and the end of the announcement that brought him back to this place. He hadn’t checked his phone since before his name had been said, and had been so caught up in the whirlwind of returning to the Hall that he completely missed the initial notification, his phone buzzing now to bring his attention to the missed message.

It was a single text from Declan.

 **dicklan:** we’re going to get you back, i love yuo

The last word was misspelled, like Declan knew that he needed to send the message as fast as possible, or miss his opportunity. Tillman knew that he wouldn’t be able to reply, instead staring at the words on the screen with rapt attention, like they would somehow disappear if he wasn’t looking. He knew it wouldn’t send, but he pulled up the keyboard anyway, typing out a quick message and hitting send. He stood up, tossing his phone on the dingy bed and wiping off his face. He supposed he ought to cause some trouble while he was down here, putting on a characteristic shit-eating grin and walking out the door, calling out, “Honey, I’m home!!” He heard several groans coming from around the Hall as the door to his room shut behind him.

On his bed, his phone sat unlocked, a spinning wheel trying to send his text before an error popped up.

 **twinkman:** pog  
**Message not delivered. Try again?**


End file.
